A completely scientific study by the team at Austad's Golf
Golf dads are a different breed.
They can identify a golf ball from 40 yards away. They’ve told the same birdie story 17 times. And somehow, despite slicing two drives into another zip code, they still think they “almost had it figured out today.”
In honor of Father’s Day, we decided to rank the most absolutely, undeniably “dad” things golfers do.
If you recognize your dad (or yourself) in this list… we’re not judging. We’re just observing.
10. Saying “That’ll Play” After Literally Any Shot
Dead center of the fairway? "That'll play."
Low screaming hook that bounced off a cart path and somehow stayed in bounds? “That’ll play.”
Golf dads treat every surviving golf shot like a tactical masterpiece.
9. Refusing to Buy New Clubs Despite Complaining About Their Current Ones Every Round
Dad: “I just don’t hit this driver like I used to.”
Also dad: drive was purchased during the George W. Bush administation, grips feel like concrete, shaft technology is basically archaeology, and the club face sounds like a frying pan. But sure, probably not the equipment.
8. Standing Over a Putt Like It’s the Final Putt at Augusta
This four-foot putt is for triple bogey, during a super casual round, or against absolutely nobody.
And yet Dad is reading grain, wind, slope, humidity, and possibly moon patterns before pulling the trigger.
7. Telling Everyone About “That One Round”
Every golf dad has one.
That one round where he shot 74, drove to the green on 11, almost qualified for something, and beat somebody who "used to be really good."
You weren't there but you've heard the story 500 times.
6. Carrying Enough Golf Balls to Survive a Natural Disaster
Golf dads Never run out of golf balls. Open the bag and you will find 14 random sleeves, 3 found balls, one ancient Top-Flite, a muddy Pro V1 from 9 years ago, and at least two balls with company logos on them.
Could he clean the bag out? Sure. Will he? Absolutely not.
5. Giving Swing Tips Nobody Asked For
You're on the range minding your own business when suddenly "You came over the top a little there."
Thanks, dad.
Bonus points if the advice comes immediately after he snap-hooks one into the parking lot.
4. Keeping Every Scorecard “For Statistics”
Golf dads LOVE golf stats.
Fairways Putts. Greens. Penalties.
Meanwhile the scorecard itself looks like it survived a flood and hasn’t been organized since 2009.
3. Saying “I’m Just Here to Have Fun” Before Becoming Extremely Competitive
Golf dads enter every round pretending they’re relaxed.
Then Steve drains a 20-footer on Hole 3 and suddenly money games appear, gimmies disappear, and the rules get very official.
Classic dad behavior.
2. Wearing the Same Lucky Golf Polo for 14 Straight Seasons
Every golf dad has one shirt that should probably be retired, somehow still survives laundry cycles, and it "just feels right."
And no, he will not be replacing it anytime soon.
1. Spending Four and a Half Hours Complaining About Golf… Then Booking Another Tee Time Immediately After
This is the ultimate golf dad move.
For 18 holes the greens are too slow, the driver is broken, the bunkers are terrible and "nothing feels right."
Then before leaving the parking lot: "Same time next Saturday?"
That is top tier dad behavior.
Some Honorable Mentions
We decided to throw in a few other incredibly "dad" golf behaviors:
- Calling every good putt "center cut"
- Saying "sit" to every approach shot
- Taking 9 practice swings then chunking
- Buying gadgets instead of lessons
- Talking about weather conditions like a PGA Tour meteorologist
The Truth About Golf Dads
As funny as golf dads can be… they’re also the reason a lot of us fell in love with the game in the first place. They taught us how to grip a club, golf etiquette, how to shake off bad shots, and why time on course matters. We learned so much and we wouldn't change a thing.
Need a Father’s Day Gift for Your Favorite Golf Dad?
Whatever type of golfer your dad is, at Austad's Golf we'll have something he will love.
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